Thomas Boom Button

My son Jake was 3.5 years old at the time of Gwyn's diagnoses and since preschoolers become emotionally responsive to everyday events, we saw the effects of cancer on Jake. He started having accidents after being potty trained for a year and a half, then the night terrors came, demands of not eating anything that would make him "sick"...especially candy from trick-or-treating at Halloween. In fact, Jake called off Halloween. He canceled his 4th Birthday and Christmas.

Jake became obsessively scared to "get sick like sissy and go to the hospital". As soon as I noticed the signs, I spoke to a social worker, I went online to seek foundations that could help children under this sort of emotional stress, I signed up for a sibling program....nothing. I waited, then reconnected with some of the mentioned resources and waited some more. Frustrated and discouraged, I abandoned the idea of outside help. If not for my background in Early Childhood Development and years in the classroom teaching "challenging students" and practicing techniques that actually work, somebody would be in therapy right now. *achh-hem*

In the last month of Gwyn's 6 month therapy, we received a packet for Jake with some coloring pages. The day we came home from clinic for Gwyn's last chemotherapy, Jake received a trophy in the mail for being a Super Sib.

 

 

 

 

Jake escaped into his own world of hairless wonder. We enrolled him in an educational computer program I used in the classroom; JumpStart. He would spend hours on the computer at a time, learning, exploring and earning points.  When creating your character, you can select all the little styling details such as clothing, head shapes and skin tones, eye color, hair style and your name. Jake, a.k.a. Thomas Boom Button, played around with his styling from time to time, but the unchanged factor was the bald head and his signature number one navy blue shirt. I'd be lying if I said it didn't affect me.

One day in the month of October, Jake said "I want to be an Imagination Mover for Halloween". (again? he was that last year. quick, think. how to react. don't make a big deal or he might withdrawal...don't acknowledge and the costume is toast.) "Cool Jake, we already have that costume". Then, YO GABBA GABBA started airing their Halloween episode every other day. And since that is what Gwyn watched for every Broviac dressing change and flush, the song with the phrase "too much candy's gonna make you sick..." was sent to Jake as a message. Halloween was canceled again. Don't worry, I took the costume, we went to Mimi & Clyde's and watched the trick-or-treaters come knocking. 30 minutes after passing out candy to an army of little goblins, Jake was jumping out of his skin and into his costume. We went, we received, we returned. We dumped his loot on the table and sorted..."Jake, only pick 3 candies. Too much candy will make you sick".

In November, Jake turned 4 with a handful of witnesses to see him eat cake and not "get sick". December came and Gwyn had her Broviac removed in light of her updated status, No Evidence of Disease. Santa came to town and the New Year began.

Here we are, back at Halloween.
me - "hey Jake, what do you want to be for Halloween this year?"
Jake - "an Imagination Mover"
me - "sorry, that costume is way too small for you, look in this catalog and pick something"
Jake - "okay, how about a shark!"